I love this wording, God’s Dreams for Me, from Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John Lynch in their book, “TrueFaced.”  They spend the first half of the book essentially building the case that “God’s dreams for us are the ultimate goal.”  In the last few weeks, I’d picked up this book after reading it and putting it aside a few years ago.  Some circumstances and issues that I’ve been wrestling with for awhile seemed to propel me back to this particular book for some something that might speak deeply to my soul and provide a glimmer of insight and understanding.

So when I got to today’s reading (November 10th) in “My Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers, the territory was familiar.  For some time, I’ve been meditation upon Proverbs 3:5-12 in The Message.  It starts out “Trust God from the bottom of your heart.”  Seems simple enough, right?  Not for me!

All of my life I’ve bought into the notion that “if it is to be, it’s up to me.”  My father’s death as I turned 13 helped to brand into my soul that I was on my own…that there was nobody that had my back.  Our culture underscored this concept with a constant barrage of “Just Do It” and “Grab all the Gusto You Can.”  You can’t rely on anyone else.  Make your own way in this world.

And so in my spiritual life, all of this mix has grown in volume over the years to create discord.  So many of the many success strategies and steps to build a wonderfully happy and fulfilling life just don’t resonate any longer.  And I’ve about figured out that for me, it’s God.  It’s God calling me out and calling me up to do what the guys in “TrueFaced” share and what Chambers wrote so many years ago:

• “If you seek great things for yourself, thinking, ‘God has called me for this and for that,’ you barricade God from using you.  As long as you maintain your own personal interests and ambitions, you cannot be completely aligned or identified with God’s interests.”
• “I must learn that the purpose of my life belongs to God, not me.”
• “…all He asks of me is that I trust Him.”
• “He simply asks me to have absolute faith in Him and His goodness.”

This whole trust thing often seems passive to my way of thinking.  But for me, that’s really an illusion…a lie.  With all that I’ve been trained and taught and steeped in, learning to trust God from the bottom of my heart is right up there with the toughest of things I’ve ever embarked upon.  It’s anything but passive.  Like Chambers, I’m choosing to go to the place “When I stop telling God what I want, (so) He can freely work His will in me without any hindrance.”  That’s truly what I want.  I desire God’s Dreams for Me!